Q5: When you lost, what technique did the enemy use to defeat you? Is there a pattern? If you could replay the event, what could you have done to beat him? What drills can you do to make sure you win next time he tries something similar?
For a moment, take the perspective of
your Adversary. Why would it be to your advantage if your victim forgot how you
defeated them? Likewise, how could you benefit by getting them to focus on
feelings of shame, self-pity, disappointment, and similar things instead of on the
strategies you used to beat them?
We all have daily battles with temptation. Some of those battles may include habits and addiction. Other battles may be smaller parts of our value system such as, "I value reducing the amount of sugar I eat" or perhaps, "I value showing respect to the elderly." Whether the conflicts are large or small, Satan frequently works to get the
people he has beaten in battle to forget how he defeated them. That
allows him to use the same strategy against them over and over again. When they do think about the recent loss, he
tries to get them to focus on feelings of shame and failure so that they never
actually learn from their experience. By using one of the questions from
the Captain’s Log in the book Like Dragons Did They Fight, you can learn
from your losses and avoid much of the shame that Satan works to hit you with.
What technique did the enemy use to
defeat you? Notice that the first part of the Q5 focuses on technique, not
failure. The question isn't "Why did you mess up? What did you do
wrong?" Instead the question focuses on how a brilliant and skilled
opponent outwitted you. Figuring out what you did wrong, frankly, isn't very
helpful. However, figuring out the tactic of your adversary is. Once you
understand the strategy, it is a lot easier to defeat in its various
reincarnations.
Is there a pattern? There is very
frequently a pattern to the way Satan attacks. If a tactic worked before then
he'll almost certainly use it again. There are several things you can look for
to try to identify patterns. Look for a common time of day. Are you typically
attacked closer to when you wake up, go to sleep, or somewhere in between? Is
there a common location you are attacked at? A particular room in the house or
place at work or school? Is there a common strategy?
Chemical Scale- Many people
have a hard time remembering the details of their lost battles. It is very
insightful to plot what they do remember from the battle on the Chemical Scale.
By working backwards on the scale, you will find cues that help you remember
important details that would be difficult to recall otherwise. You can follow
this link here for a more detailed dive into the Chemical Scale
than what we will do here.
It may be helpful to think of the
chemical scale as one of those large coin donation funnels that you see
at malls and museums. You place the coin on the little ramp, then let it roll
around the large plastic funnel. At first the coin stays near the top, making
large circuits that are relatively slow. The coin gradually rolls further in,
moving faster and faster. Eventually the coin is completely horizontal, moving
so fast around the small throat at the bottom of the funnel that it blurs into
what looks like a ring instead of a coin. Then, the coin drops out of sight and
with a small "clink" is out of your possession for good.
The Level 10 is "The Crash"
or when the battle is lost. Using the coin funnel analogy, this is when the coin
falls inside and is now beyond your reach. Up to this point you could lean in
and snatched the coin back if you are fast enough, but now the coin/battle is
gone and all you can do is learn from the past and prepare for the future.
At what point was the battle actually
lost? At what point was it too late to turn things around, too late to snatch
the coin out of the funnel?
In Levels 6 through 9 there isn't much
to talk about. Your coin is over halfway into the funnel and rapidly spinning
out of control.
Your Level 5 "Forget it!"
moment is when you stop caring, stop trying, and throw in the towel. You
haven't actually lost yet, but you've stopped fighting. This is when your coin
tips past the halfway point and really begins to pick up speed. What was your
"Forget it!" moment like for you?
Level 4 is the Irrational Conversation
where you seem to be debating with yourself about losing. One voice is trying
to talk you out of it, while another voice is telling you it's not a big deal,
that you won't "go all the way" this time. What did your Level 4
sound like? How long did it last?
Level 3, the "Dude!" Moment,
is the first time that the temptation to do something against your value system
enters your thoughts. What did it sound like? How many of these did you get
before it turned into the Irrational Conversation?
Level 2 is the Unedifying Emotion that
you wanted relief from. This is what made the "Dude!" Moment even
seem like an idea worth considering. What emotional experiences were you
having? How long had they been going on before they turned to Level 3?
The Chemical Drip at Level 1 is the
first time you felt a little off, a little less motivated, or similar
sensations. What was that like and when did it happen?
Level 0 is the point where you are in
complete control of yourself. Using the coin donation analogy, your coin is
still in your hand and hasn't even touched the ramp at the top of the funnel.
Before this battle, when was the last time you can remember being "Zeroed
Out," where you were in full control and in communication with the Holy
Ghost? Does it surprise you how much, or how little, time you spent at a 1 or 2
before Satan hit you with the rest of the battle?
Identifying lies- There are at
least three places in scripture where Satan is called the "father of all
lies." In nearly all lost battles there are lies that he persuades us to
believe. There are more noticeable lies, like the stuff you hear at Level 4,
and very subtle lies, like the things you can hear at Levels 1 and 2. Sometimes
these are ways he persuades us to limit our power, in other words limiting
beliefs. For example, Satan may persuade you to believe that you are too
tired to do what needs to be done. He is getting you to limit your capacity by
making you believe you are more tired than you actually are. What were the lies you fell for in this most
recent loss? What are the truths?
If you could replay the event, what
could you have done to beat him? This is the point where you analyze
what you could have done differently. Answering this question after
analyzing everything else helps you be more aware of what you can do
differently next time. If the previous parts of the Q5 have gone well answering
this question will not bring any shame, only insight and understanding.
What drills can you do to make sure
you win next time he tries something similar? Satan will likely use the same
technique again under different circumstances. What strategies and tools
will you put in place? How will you
drill and practice? This is perhaps the most important part of doing a
Lost Battle Analysis, planning how you will win in the future.
When you begin to have more success in
your battles, it is also instructive to analyze any “close-calls” or “near
misses” where you just manage to win. By walking through the same process
with these close-calls, you can determine how to strengthen your Border Patrol
before you have a real lost battle. The
only thing that changes is how the questions are phrased.
In scripture and in General Conference
talks, there are many references to the principle of learning by our own
experiences. Your lost battles and close-calls are crucial parts of your
experience. You can learn more about how to improve and progress in your goals
by analyzing your lost battles than from most any other resource. Following the
outline of a Q5 is an excellent way to help you learn from your own experience
what you need to do to improve and become more perfect in winning your personal
battles.
To hire me as your life coach where we can create a plan to put the above principles into practice for you, follow this link. Fighting Like a Dragon - Life Coaching
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